Giving up alcohol.(it's worth a shot)

 I'm fuming, tired,in pain and discombobulated.  I have not had a good day this day and to quote Monty Python: I didn't want to be a nurse!I wanted to be a Lumberjack.  Rough day.  Lots of negative emotion felt this day.   I've been absolutely run ragged, which can be part of the job of course,but its much harder to stomach when you're a fat recovering alkie with arthritic knees and, going off my ankle right now, arthritic ankle as well.  Sometimes its hard to grin and bear it. Although it does become an art form in nursing.  And although in the previous blog,I talked about catastrophising small situations to give the addictive brain a reason to crave, today has literally just been a genuine rough day. The alkie brain is like " Oh! You havent exagerrated things like you usually do! "  So of course thoughts of booze and off licenses emerged and to be fair that pissed me off as it just added to the day.  I spent a large part of the day mut...

Well I'll start with the good stuff.  I've been abstinent for 2 weeks now! Hooray!  I just got fed up of cutting down to be fair,I felt it was just needless boozing at that stage.   I get it's important if you're physically addicted to it, and would advocate to my dying days that slowly cutting back is imperative  in that situation.  In mine,not so much. I felt ready to let go of the emotional crutch. And with it has come some brain fog and narkiness.  This happened before to a much greater extent where I needed Thiamine from the doctor. Not so much now but I'm going to get some over the counter vitamin B compound. Alcoholism drains you of your vitamin Bs.  I'm definitely getting aggy with it,as the general life stressors are no longer being placated with booze. The alcoholic part of my brain is in fight or flight mode, primarily fight.  How dare I give up the life juice. As such I've started quite untintentionally or maybe intentionally?cata...