How having an addiction alters perception

 I have begun to see things with sober eyes now, and one of the biggest impacts on me so far is my altered perception of my living condition.

My perception prior to sobriety:

"Yeah..house is a bit of a state but it's OK.  Needs cleaning tbh but I'm too busy working. I'm too busy with my Masters. Bob's ill, Pepe is ill, I'm tired.  "

My perception now:

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FK IS THAT IN MY SLOW COOKER? WHEN DID I USE MY SLOW COOKER? I'VE NOT USED MY SLOW COOKER FOR MONTHS! WHERE ARE MY PLATES? WHY ARE MY PLATES ALL IN THE SINK? OMG WHAT'S THAT SMELL? WHY IS EVERYTHING MOULDY?"

See, I've got used to seeing my life through the bottom of a bottle.  My perception of the reality I live in has changed hugely! My old perception was that I went to work, did my job, came home, fed myself, went to sleep. 

Sobriety feels like an alternate universe at the moment. Instead of Alice Through The Looking Glass, it was Holstead Through The Brandy Glass 🙈

Tonight I've started to use my new perception as my guide and started to clean this cesspit. No word of a lie, I've binned so much stuff which was beyond bleaching. 

I'm actually ashamed that i live like this but that shame, especially now through sober eyes,  will go towards my abstinence journey. 

And I have to say,  I quite like sober cleaning! What a great stress relief!

It's ace! So much venting via bleach and scouring pad 🤣



Comments

  1. Emily W9 November 2021 at 17:40

    ❤️❤️❤️ You deserve a spic and span home for your clear eyes. Proud of you! ❤️

    ReplyDelete
  2. Doreen10 November 2021 at 02:37

    You go girl your 💥 btw I have 1 of your plates 😂 so so proud of you 👏 x

    ReplyDelete

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